F5. F5. F5. F5. F5. F5. F5. And more F5.

Nothing seems to be moving.

On Monday, I decided to get out my trusty bottle of God’s finest condiment ever known, aka. Bacon Salt.

Unfortunately, the “salt” was stuck, so nothing would come out. And it felt sort of wrong. No matter, I griped online. Also known as griping on Twitter. After all, I was a loyal follower to the Bacon Salt Twitter page (@baconsalt) and I put their name in my tweet once or twice. Or maybe more, I can’t remember.

Then I check my Twitter profile a while later and I find out I get a Direct Message from them, and they offer to replace my bottle of that sweet, sweet original Bacon Salt, with its lovely spices and— I’m getting way off topic. Anyway, they told me to send an email to their orders thing, and I bashed off a quick message, and these guys don’t even need proof. I’ve never heard of a company that actually trusted me! These guys are wonderful. I’ve considered sending this story to the Consumerist, but they probably have tons of these warm and fuzzy stories.

Anyway, to the guy/monkey/whatever that reads this stuff at that fancy Bacon Salt office of yours, you’ve made a customer for life.

Hopefully, my awesome Chrome bag will arrive without delay. But then again, it is UPS.

Package Progress

Location Date Local Time Description

OAKLAND,CA,  US 20/06/2009 4:01 ARRIVAL SCAN

WEST SACRAMENTO,CA,  US 19/06/2009 20:58 ARRIVAL SCAN

MATHER,CA,  US 19/06/2009 20:55 DEPARTURE SCAN

19/06/2009 19:00 ARRIVAL SCAN

CHICO,CA,  US 19/06/2009 18:54 DEPARTURE SCAN

19/06/200918:10 ORIGIN SCAN

19/06/2009 15:47 PICKUP SCAN

US19/06/2009 20:02

BILLING INFORMATION RECEIVED

Anyway, I just realized I typed a bullshit phone number, something like 11111111 instead of my mobile number. Now how will I get my stuff from UPS? I guess I’ll have to be home for the next week, just waiting for my stuff.

EDIT: Tis here, faggots.

I’ll be honest. I don’t like Michael Arrington. He’s a dick, and he likes to boast about his death threats like it’s some sort of moose he hangs on the wall.

See that? My favorite tech dudes who doesn’t swear a lot (if at all) goes into rage mode because he has a loaner unit rather than a purchased unit, and Arrington goes into jounalistic-ethics-fly-out-the-window mode when he not-very-subtly implies this influences Leo Laporte’s opinion over the Pre. Seriously? Other than saying “I got this for free”, I don’t see what’s the problem with that. You have to return it. You’re not being bribed, you’re not keeping it. I don’t see the fuss.

Then of course, Leo dropped the f-bomb. He cut the live stream. Sheesh, that was nuts.

I never liked Techcrunch. I’ve seen too many Web 2.0 blogs, and the only one I read from time to time is Mashable. And Arrington likes to go around saying, “I’m a millionaire! This Web 2.0 site is going to fail! It’s not even out yet!” And VCs, who are dependent on TC’s “analysis”, will immediately deny funding for a perfectly good startup just because Arrington likes to say how much it sucks. Then there were the death threats.

Look, I don’t like death threats. Nobody does. So you say, “I got a death threat. Some guy said he would slice my head.” Fine. Whatever. But this guy obsessively likes to cover his threats. Like when he said some guy spat in his face. He totally deserved it. Well, I don’t think people should spit in your face, but still.

I don’t care what anyone says, Arrington is a dick in the startup world. I’d much rather go for Jason Calacanis. He has that startups podcast I enjoy.

(If you are the authorities, the following post is completely false. All of it.)

I’ve been acting all piratey, with my downloading the unreleased (!) Rock Band Unplugged PSP game (which isn’t bad, actually) and the torrent of a bigass HD film featuring the one guy who’s way better looking than Hugh Jackman (in my opinion, anyway)… Clive Owen. It seems to be in nice quality, though Windows Media Player sucks shit and won’t decode the audio, when I discovered WMP 11 doesn’t do AC3. Reall?y? You can’t do one of the most popular audio formats in the world? You can’t be serious.

Anyway, I’m thinking of getting all uber piratey and burning it to a DVD, but that requires lots of transcoding. So whatever.

Speaking of transcoding, my laptop is suspiciously slow for some reason. In Firefox, when I go to any site, it will suddenly slow down, and anything I type with just freeze and suddenly work again. Like right now. And right now. And… now. You get the point. Then again, I haven’t restarted my computer in ages, so that may be the problem. But come on, it’s the FUCKING 21ST CENTURY! I do not expect my computer to be taken to a world of suck just because it can’t handle being used for a month straight without a restart. I was also under the impression that Bill Gates (or Bill G for you gangsta rappers running on Windows) said that XP was very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very stable.

Or maybe he used less of those very’s.

Then again, it’s not all fun and games with Windows. My computers that run Windows usually have one problem or the other, but unlike some wussy faggots out there that crouch and hide at the sound of an error message that move to Mac at their earliest convenience, I suck it up and take it like a man and I keep using Windows… or at least move to Slackware. Wonderful bastards, mastering the Linux kernel like that, those coders.

Anyway, back to torrenting shit.